Unlock Innovation - Talk to a Stranger
Barbra Carlisle • April 17, 2025
Why talking to strangers is good for innovative thinking
Introduction
Going down to London a couple of weeks ago I was looking forward to putting on a good podcast and ignoring everything and everyone around me. That is until a woman, Melanie, came and plonked down next to me, with her pile of papers and her phone ringing.
Once she had taken the call, she smiled at me, I smiled back and this led to a 2 and half hour conversation on all things from professional development to managing long distant relationships.
I got off the train more energised, connected and ready for the day than if I had stuck my headphones in.
We arranged to meet for a coffee back in Liverpool.
Why am I telling you this?
Because in business, we often talk about the importance of networks and collaboration—but what if some of the most transformative insights come not from your inner circle, but from a stranger on a train, a chance encounter at a conference, or a casual conversation over coffee?
The Research
A recent UK study from the University of Essex (Sandstrom et al., 2022) showed that small talk with strangers can significantly improve mood, empathy, and creativity. More importantly, these fleeting interactions often lead to the sharing of ideas that would otherwise remain siloed. In a time when innovation and agility are everything, this matters.
Another UK study by Nesta (2019) on innovation diffusion found that ideas spread faster in communities where “weak ties” are strong—those acquaintances and peripheral connections that sit just outside our usual networks. They introduce novelty and challenge groupthink, something every CEO navigating complexity should pay attention to.
The Leadership Lens
When I work with CEOs, those in peer networks always value that outside in perspective, a fresh set of eyes. When I interviewed Tom Morgan for The Unlikely Executive Podcast he highlighted the power of talking to absolute strangers. His stranger was on the side of a soccer pitch. Showing that real breakthroughs can happen when you put down your guard and just share what your thoughts and ideas are.
The 5 Voices framework reminds us that each person has a unique voice—and when we only surround ourselves with people who speak “like us,” we lose access to vital perspectives.
When leaders only stay within their trusted circle, something important is lost. You may protect consistency and control (a strength of the Guardian), but you risk missing the unexpected insight that could change everything. Often, it’s the Creative or Connector in the room who first sees the value in an offhand comment or a half-formed idea. These seemingly small conversations—ones we often don’t prioritise—are where innovation is born.”
The Call
So here’s an invitation: be deliberate about bumping into brilliance. Attend a meet-up that’s outside your industry. Talk to a stranger, say hello as a starter! This method was used by Mel Robbins to great effect when she moved home and is outlined in her brilliant book Let Them.
Most of all, create cultures where your team talks beyond their silos too. You might be surprised by where the next big idea comes from—and who it comes from.
Curious what kind of conversations might unlock new thinking for you as a leader? Let’s talk. barbra@gleecoaching.com
When I first stepped into a leadership role, I did what many of us do, I mirrored the leadership styles I had seen in action as a young professional. I had seen Cathy Garner at the Housing Corporation back in the mid 90s invite me to a senior level meeting and me to reply "Why Cathy I don't have anything useful to say" and her saying "Barbra it is about being in the room. Come, it will not be a waste of your time". Brilliant advice. I also sub consciously took in the directive leaders, the nice to face not quite so nice behind your back leaders and began to learn that leadership means different things to different people. I also experienced leaders who manipulated and coerced me into positions that were simply not comfortable for a young female professional. What I came to learn that I had to be naturally me as a leader. Yes I over share, yes I make light of things, yes I am a glass half full person. I worked on recognising when that style didn't bring the best out of the people around me and I flexed my style. Uncomfortable but definitely rewarding. We all have it in our gift to ask "what kind of leader do I actually want to be?" In today’s leadership landscape, especially in the charity and non-profit sector, authenticity isn’t just a nice-to-have — it’s essential. According to recent research from CIPD, only 26% of L&D leaders feel their organisations are truly receptive to their ideas. That disconnect often stems from leaders not feeling confident in their own voice, or unsure how to bring their full selves to the table. Or bringing their full selves without filters and being told they are too loud, too this or too that. Why your leadership style matters Your leadership style shapes how people experience you — and how they experience their work. When you lead in a way that aligns with your values and personality, you create psychological safety, trust, and clarity. When you lead in a way that feels performative or borrowed, it can create confusion or even mistrust. When you lead without any consideration of what it is like to be on the other side of you I am sorry to say you will fail. Because not everyone will work well with the natural you. At Glee Coaching, I often work with new CEOs and senior leaders who are still figuring out what kind of leader they want to be. Some are navigating imposter syndrome. Others are trying to balance being approachable with being strategic. The truth is, there’s no one-size-fits-all model. But there is a way to lead that feels like you — and that’s where the real impact happens. How to start finding your style Observe, but don’t copy. Learn from others, but filter it through your own values and strengths. Ask for feedback. Not just on performance, but on how people experience your leadership. Try tools that build self-awareness. Programmes like Discover Your Leadership Voice (which I run monthly) help leaders understand their natural communication style and how to adapt it to others. Reflect regularly. What’s working? What feels forced? What energises you? Leadership isn’t about being the loudest voice in the room. It’s about being the clearest, most consistent version of yourself — and helping others do the same. Get in touch if you want to chat about how you can find your own style of leadership that works for you and those around you.
“I learnt a lot by going in and making the cups of tea, and hoovering up for them.” That quote came from Alan Adams, General Manager of Southport Flower Show and a guest on my podcast *The Unlikely Executive*. It stuck with me, not because it was about tea or hoovers ( though I do like the former, the latter less so), but because it captured something about a certain type of leadership: the insight that comes from experiencing all aspects of the organisation. I believe this links to leader empathy. In the charity sector, I have met three broad types of leaders 1. those who have 'worked' their way up 2. those who have pivoted from private to third sector and entered at a senior level (more about them in a later newsletter article) 3. those who have almost been pushed into leadership through personal circumstance (for example those who set up charities on the back of a personal trauma - again I will post about this at a later date) Today I want to focus on those who have worked their way up. They’ve been on the frontlines, run community events, answered helpline calls. That experience gives them a deep understanding of the people they serve and the teams they lead. But what if you didn’t start there? What if you came into leadership from another sector, or stepped into a senior role early in your career? Does that mean you’re missing something? Not necessarily. But it does mean you need to be intentional about how you connect with the frontline. Why it matters Leaders who understand the day-to-day realities of their teams make better decisions. They build more trust. They’re more likely to spot issues early and respond with empathy. In a recent People Management report, 41% of UK businesses now see learning and development as central to their strategy. That includes developing leaders who can connect across levels — not just manage from the top. How to build that connection (even if you didn’t start at the bottom) Spend time with your team. Not just in meetings, but in their world. Sit in on calls. Visit service sites. Ask questions. Listen without fixing. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is listen without jumping in with a solution. Be curious, not performative. People can tell when you’re ticking a box. Show genuine interest in their work and challenges. Share your own learning curve. Vulnerability builds trust. If you’re learning, say so. - my own personal favourite - have a work experience week - where you do a role that you have never tried before and take advice and guidance from the current postholder. At Glee, I work with leaders who want to lead with more empathy and impact — whether they started on the frontlines or not. What matters most is your willingness to understand, adapt, and grow. Because leadership isn’t about where you started. It’s about how you show up now.
