Trusting Friends to enable Leadership

Barbra Carlisle • March 16, 2025

How friends can help us unlock our leadership potential 

Taking on a senior leadership role, whether Project Director or Chair of the Board, is a significant milestone. When you think about why you took your last role do you recall seeking advice from others on whether the role was right for you? 

Nick, in the throws of trying to recover from a stroke, was encouraged by a fried to write a blog. The friend had created a blog page in anticipation of Nick’s answer. Nick had been thinking about writing a book, but recovery was slow, so he accepted his friend’s challenge to start writing a blog. The blog gained momentum, ultimately resulting in a charity for stroke survivors being set up by Nick. Well timed actionable encouragement indeed!

We are often influenced by the advice and encouragement of colleagues and friends, even if in reality they know very little about what your 
day job is! 

While this support can be invaluable, it's essential to navigate the pros and cons of acting on others' advice and maintain control over your choices.

Pros and Cons of Acting on Others' Advice

Pros:
• Diverse Perspectives: Friends and colleagues can offer different viewpoints, helping you see challenges and opportunities from various angles.
• Emotional Support: Trusted friends provide encouragement and reassurance, boosting your confidence in making decisions.
• Experience Sharing: Colleagues who have faced similar situations can share valuable insights and lessons learned.

 Cons:
• Over-Reliance: Relying too heavily on others' advice can lead to a lack of personal accountability and decision-making autonomy.
• Conflicting Opinions: Diverse perspectives can sometimes lead to conflicting advice, making it challenging to determine the best course of action.
• Pressure to Conform: Feeling obligated to follow friends' advice can result in decisions that don't align with your values or vision.

Staying in Control of Your Choices

To maintain control over your choices while benefiting from others' advice, consider the following strategies:

Reflect on Advice: Take time to reflect on the advice you receive and how it aligns with your goals and values.
Seek Multiple Opinions: Gather insights from various sources to ensure a well-rounded perspective.
Trust Your Instincts: Ultimately, trust your instincts and make decisions that feel right for you.
• Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries to ensure that you remain the primary decision-maker in your leadership journey.
• Work with a Leadership Coach who can challenge you in a non-judgemental way to help unlock your own thinking about a situation or an opportunity 

Take a step now 
If you want to find out more about Nick’s journey please visit The Unlikely Executive Podcast Episode #5 where I explore how Nick Clarke CEO of StrokeInformation stepped into his role. 

If you are curious to know how other people’s actions and intentions influence your decisions come and join me on the 5 Voices for Teams programme where we cover personality preferences, communication, getting your message across and what it is like to be on the other side of you.

I support leaders in non-profit organisations and those passionate about Leadership for Good. My mission is to help leaders recognise their brilliance—and that of their teams—so growth is sustained and accelerated.

By Barbra Carlisle July 22, 2025
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By Barbra Carlisle July 22, 2025
Newsflash - Leading is not Managing! Why the Distinction Matters For years, many professionals, myself included, assumed that leadership and management were one and the same. After all, both involve guiding people and achieving goals. But in today’s dynamic and complex business environment, understanding the difference between leadership and management is essential. At Glee Coaching, we help individuals and organisations harness the power of both disciplines to drive performance, engagement, and long-term success. What Is Leadership? Leadership is about vision, influence, and transformation. It’s the ability to inspire others, create a compelling future, and guide people toward shared goals even in the face of uncertainty. As John C. Maxwell famously said, “Leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing less.” Leaders focus on: Setting direction rather than controlling outcomes Inspiring trust rather than demanding compliance Fostering innovation rather than maintaining the status quo Research from Harvard Business Review highlights that the best leaders are those who can move beyond titles and focus on action engaging in behaviours that inspire, align, and mobilise others. These leaders are not just visionaries; they are catalysts for change. What Is Management? Management, on the other hand, is about structure, execution, and consistency. It ensures that systems run smoothly, resources are used efficiently, and objectives are met on time and within budget. Peter Drucker, the father of modern management, once said: “Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.” Managers excel at: Planning and organising Monitoring performance Solving problems and mitigating risks Gallup showed that managers are the single biggest factor in employee engagement, accounting for up to 70% of the variance in team engagement levels. This means that effective management isn’t just operational it is foundational to team morale and productivity. Leadership vs. Management: A Strategic Balance Rather than viewing leadership and management as opposing forces, I tend to think of them as complementary disciplines. The most effective professionals know when to lead and when to manage. A helpful rule of thumb I use is that Leaders should be 80% strategic and 20% tactical while Managers should be 80% tactical and 20% strategic. This balance is echoed in a 15-year study by HBR contributor James R. Bailey, who found that the most successful executives blend both leadership and management behaviours adapting fluidly to the needs of their teams and organisations. Issues that my coaching clients bring tend to be around the perceived need of leaders to sit in the transactional tactical doer space. Why You Need Both in Today’s Workplace In a world of hybrid teams, rapid innovation, and constant change, organisations need people who can: Lead with purpose and authenticity Build high-performing, collaborative teams Manage complexity with confidence and agility Gallup’s global engagement data shows that when managers are disengaged, team performance suffers dramatically. Conversely, when leaders are purpose-driven and aligned with their values, they inspire greater commitment and resilience across the organisation. If you're curious about how coaching can support this development, explore our What Is Coaching page . How Glee Coaching Can Help At Glee Coaching, we offer tailored leadership and management development programmes that help you: Discover your authentic leadership style Strengthen your management toolkit Navigate the transition from manager to leader (or vice versa) Build confidence, clarity, and capability Whether you're stepping into your first leadership role or refining your executive presence, we are here to support your journey. Call to Action Ready to explore your leadership potential or refine your management style? 👉 Visit our programmes to discover programmes designed for impact or call Barbra